Life Isn't Fair

Daily Quote

"I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?"
-Bill Watterson-

"The world is not fair, and often, fools, cowards, liars and the selfish hide in high places."
-Bryant McGill-

Lesson of the Day

Life isn't fair. That's a fact. Life operates on a set of rules, completely independent of our sense of justice or fairness. You can find someone that you love with all of your heart, truly, and never be able to  be more than a friend to them. You can give your all and hold nothing back, and still fail due to conditions outside your control. You can have the most potential of any human being, and die shortly after birth. Life isn't fair, life doesn't bend to our whims and desires. There is no life that you're supposed to live. There is nothing that you're supposed to do, nothing that you're supposed to have or achieve. Whatever comes, is what comes. Just because you're smart doesn't mean you'll ever get a chance to do more than labor. Just because you want something, doesn't mean you can ever have it. Just because you hurt, doesn't mean the wound will ever fade. Life isn't fair. Drop the expectations, because they aren't real. Live in real life, not in some illusion. Yeah, it might be starker, or more depressing, but at least it's real.

Questions to Ponder

Do you live in the real world, or in an illusion? Do you expect things from life?  Do you life your life to what you want it to be? Or according to what others want it to be? Are you seeing clearly?

Gratitude

I'm thankful today for clarity, for being able to see things for what they are. I'm thankful for being me, in all of my dark and all of my light. Thank you all for reading, I hope you all have a great day.

The Fear of Pain

Daily Quote

"Recovery is something that you have to work on every single day, and it's something that doesn't get a day off."

-Demi Lovato-

Lesson of the Day

Fear is everywhere these days, and indeed it's an intrinsic part of the human experience. One of the worst manifestations is hate, and the fighting that comes from it. Particularly, I'm talking about the avoidance of dealing with pain. I see these people who stay connected to others literally every waking hour of their lives, who are always with others physically, always busy, who avoid silence and solitude like the plague. In silence and solitude, we can hear our inner thoughts, process our lives and what we're feeling, to think without distraction. You see, I don't think, in this case, that people are fearing doing things alone, rather I think that they don't want to face themselves, don't want to face their lives, don't want to hurt. I've found that, in myself, I'm more apt to be overly busy when I'm hurting than when I'm doing great. When I'm hurting, I used to avoid dealing with it by staying overly busy, and I see the exact same behavior patterns in people of all ages out in the world. We avoid pain, and that's it. That's all it is, we fear pain, and so avoid it. From experience, the best path I've found is to use the silence and solitude to feel that hurt, to process it and explore it, to deal with it. I get it, it sucks when you hurt, you don't want to feel like crap. When you don't end up where you wanted to be in life, when you lose the things you love, when you fail, it hurts, I get it. Pain sucks. Do you know what's worse? Bringing that pain into everything you do, carrying it for years and years, inflicting it's negative effects on those close to you, just because you don't want to deal with it. There is no substitute to dealing with your pain, not a single one. You just pawn it off on others in a new form. Don't live in fear, deal with your issues, deal with your pain, choose to live a better life in reality than one avoiding it.

Questions to Ponder

What pains are you bringing with you? Are there things you're avoiding? If so, why? Are you truly happy, or are you so out of touch with yourself that you don't even know how you really feel? Do you know yourself?

Gratitude

Today I'm thankful for having time to be in solitude and silence. I spent the entire morning just thinking, and thus the post was born. I'm so thankful for you all, thank you all for reading! I hope you all take something from this, and that you all have a great day!

Envy

Daily Quote

"Never underestimate the power of jealousy and the power of envy to destroy. Never underestimate that."

-Oliver Stone-

Lesson of the Day

One of the worst feelings to have is envy. It's more than just unpleasant, it poisons what you do have while you pine for what you don't. The thing about envy is that it shifts your focus away from what you do have, to all the things you don't have. It makes you feel like what you have isn't good enough, makes you feel like what you have isn't worth having. One situation I often see is one in which a person sees that others have what he or she wants, whether that be money, a person's time and energy, or even being healthy. This person tends to see themselves as inferior, when they aren't. They feel like what they have isn't valuable, when, in reality, what they have is very valuable. Once you sit and think for awhile, you come to the realization that it all comes down to focus and clarity. Let's start with the latter, it's easier. Clarity is seeing clearly, so what aren't they seeing? Well, envy is a common human emotion, which means a lot of people do it. Which means that, all those people who have what you want, want what someone else has. So, in reality, there are people who are envious of what you have, who feel that what you have is more valuable than what they have. The second part of the clarity portion is that, while each party may feel that what the other person has is better, both are skewed perspectives. Settle it to say that everything you have is valuable, is worth quite a lot, whether it be friends, money, health, talents, skills, etc. What you have is valuable, believe that. Now for the former: focus. We all know what it is to focus. Take a look at an example here. There are two neighbors, and two gardens. The first neighbor's garden is beautiful, well-kept, and flourishing. The second neighbor's garden is overgrown, ugly, and headed to desolation. The first neighbor spends his time tending his garden, while the second only watches the other garden grow and flourish. The moral is to tend what you have, to focus on what you have, and what it can be. That's really the way to fight envy. The more you focus on what you have, and it's potential, the better your garden will become. Pining away at things you don't have does nothing, so take care of your life, tend your garden, see clearly, and focus.

Questions to Ponder

What do you envy? Do you fight your envy, or are you giving in to it? Do you give your own life the attention it needs to flourish and grow? What can you do better? How can you make things better?

Gratitude

I'm thankful today for what I have, all of it. I'm thankful for the opportunity to make my life great, to make things better. I'm thankful for all of you, thank you for reading, and I really hope each of you have a great day!